Posts Tagged 'roland emmerich'



Olympus Has Fallen arrived in theaters as the first of two “White House takeover” movies scheduled for release this year. We’ll talk about the other one in a minute.

This is the second movie in 4 months (after Red Dawn, which I couldn’t be bothered to see, it looked so bad) where North Koreans manage to occupy United States soil in one way or another. If you know anything about the world, particularly about North Korea, this is among the most absurd concepts in the history of cinema. It’s fantasy is what it is; something only possible in an alternate universe. Or, I suppose, in a movie with a really mediocre script. The North Koreans can barely launch a missile, and we have every reason to believe they don’t actually know where the U.S. is on a map. Their primitive navy wouldn’t make it to Hawaii, let alone the U.S. mainland. And I’m pretty sure one F-22 Raptor could destroy the entire North Korean “air force”. Yeah, they have a million-man army, but it appears their sole purpose is to put on elaborate parades doing the high-step for Kim Jong Douche in Pyongyang, which, by the way, is the only city in North Korea that has electricity. Are you catching my drift?

Continue reading ‘Mini-Review: OLYMPUS HAS FALLEN’

The 2012 Biggie Awards

The 23rd Annual Biggie Awards

aka The Biggies

for achievements in film for the year 2011

MMXI (that’s 2011 in Roman numerals, noobs), it was a strange year at the movies. Very strange indeed. For the first few months of the year, I thought it might end up being the worst overall year for the number of quality films in my adult life. Though there were a couple nice surprises early on (The Lincoln Lawyer, The Adjustment Bureau), it wasn’t until April that I finally saw a movie I truly loved (Hanna). After that, we went most of the rest of spring and almost the entire summer without a truly great movie, which instead was an unending string of disappointments and bland sequels. And I mean real bland, bland by even modern Hollywood standards (I mean, even Pixar made a subpar movie this year). That includes almost all of the major summer “tentpoles”. The big Marvel Avengers tie-in comic book flicks (Thor, Captain America) were both okay, but just okay. Then there was Green Lantern, which can only be described as godawful. I’m still having nightmares over the fact that a giant cloud of diarrhea was a villain in a movie that cost more than $250 million. Michael Bay continued crushing the memory of my childhood heroes with another shitty mess of a Transformers movie (Dark of the Moon, which was only 8.2% better than that atrocity Revenge of the Fallen), while Todd Phillips followed up one of the greatest comedies ever made (The Hangover) with an offensively lazy sequel that was almost literally a carbon copy of the first. I wanted more from J.J. Abrams‘ much-hyped Super 8 (hated the creature design, hated the ending), and although I enjoyed X-Men: First Class, it didn’t hold up as well upon a second viewing recently on Blu-ray.

Continue reading ‘The 2012 Biggie Awards’


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